The Prayer Life of Jesus (Matt. 14:22-27): Fear and Trust

The Prayer Life of Jesus: Matthew 14:22-27
Fear & Trust

INTRODUCTION:
There are many things that steal our anxiety in this world. From the safety of our children in schools to the safety of our retirement investments, there is plenty to be fearful about. Even those of us who are strong in our faith and trust God might find our hearts fearful from time to time. Women seem to be especially vulnerable and have a series of potential events that run through their head from time to time:

What if my house is broken into?
What will we do if we can’t make the mortgage payment?
If my husband died or is injured, what would I do?
Are my kids safe?
If I get sick and can’t take care of my parents, what am I going to do?

All of these are real and serious concerns. It’s not wrong to be concerned about things for which we have responsibility. But if fear turns into anxiety that causes your heart to be tormented and your mind completely preoccupied, then it’s time to reevaluate.

This year, we have another monthly series on the “Prayer Life of Jesus.” As we study through the prayer life of Jesus, let’s take a look at Matthew 14, where Matthew records that Jesus prayed. And let’s meditate on two options for which Jesus might have prayed…

THE CONTEXT OF JESUS’ PRAYER - Matthew 14:22-27:
Early in the chapter, King Herod beheads John the baptizer because John told Herod that he was in an unscriptural marriage. That’s verses 1-12. After hearing that his coworker was killed (ver. 13), Jesus withdraws to a secluded place by Himself. But the crowds would not leave Jesus alone, so He heals them.

That evening, Jesus realizes that the crowd has been with him long enough that they need food. So He feeds all 5,000 of them, not counting the women and children. That’s verses 13-21.

Verse 22 begins “Immediately” Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go ahead of them to the other side, while He sent the crowds away. John’s account records that the crowds wanted to take Jesus by force and make Him King (John 6:15). Maybe that’s the reason Jesus sent away His disciples; He wanted to keep His disciples from getting caught up in the mis-guided crowds who did not understand the nature of His kingdom.

With the disciples in the boat, headed over to the other side of the sea, Jesus sends the crowds away, and He goes up into the mountain by Himself to pray. When evening came, He was there alone (ver. 23).

What did Jesus pray for? For His own fears? For His own need to trust His heavenly Father and Jehovah God’s plans? Did He pray for His own disciples’ fears? For their need to trust Him?

If that is so, then the storm on the sea of Galilee was an opportune time for Jesus to reveal His powerful nature to them. He goes walking to them on top of the water and they cry out in fear. Jesus answers: “Take courage; it is I; do not be afraid.” Peter asks if he can walk on water and Jesus gives him that authority. Peter steps out of the boat and begins to walk to Jesus on the water. When he takes his eyes off Jesus, he sees the storm, gets scared and begins to sink.

Jesus reaches out, takes Peter by the hand, and they get into the boat. Immediately the wind stopped. The apostles in the boat all fall down before Jesus and worshiped Him, declaring that He was the Son of God (14:33)!

What did Jesus pray for while He was alone on the mountain? Perhaps He was praying for God to help Him with His own fears and that He would trust God more. Perhaps He was praying for God to strengthen His disciples’ fear and help them to trust God more.

PRAYING FOR YOUR SPOUSE’S FEARS:
If we yield to the spirit of fear, we have weakened our faith in God’s power to sustain us in every way. We have weakened our conviction that God will protect us. If we allow fear to take root in our hearts, it can push out our confidence that God has the wisdom, love, and power to care for us.

The cure for fear, of course, is faith. There’s probably not a one of us who trusts God as much as we should. But if we allow fear to be a chain around our feet, it’s hard to walk by faith. That’s why we need to pray. That’s why husbands and wives need to pray for one another. We need to pray that our spouse will be free from fear. Fear does not come from God (2 Tim. 1:7). When we truly grasp the perfect love God has for us, then there is no room for fear in our hearts (1 John 4:18). When we pray, we need to pray that we and others, our spouse, will understand that God is in control and He will not leave them nor forsake them.

Of course, we also fear man. Again, I think of our wives - there is not a woman who does not care what people think about them, or their children, their home, their work, their appearance, their husbands, or their abilities. Certainly, we need to be concerned about these things, but if that concern is too strong, it can become debilitating and it can affect how we act towards our family and others. Fear causes some people to be perfectionists, which is an impossible standard to try to meet. We need to pray that our lives will be ruled by the fear of God, not the fear of man.

A lot of times the things we struggle with most - like weight and relationships and self-respect, and our appearance or finances or guilt or doubt - these are symptoms of fear. You recall that Jesus told His disciples, “watch and pray that you do not enter into temptation. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak” (Matt. 26:41). If your husband or wife is in a constant struggle with something, a weakness of the flesh, or temptation in their life, you need to pray together that God will give the strength to resist it and be set free.

Do you know what your spouse’s biggest struggle is? Do you know what he or she fears the most? Ask what it is and then keep that in your prayers. Perhaps many of us have fears that we just don’t express.

No matter how strong your wife or your husband appears to be, they have concerns, if not fears, that they struggle with. When someone looks strong and hard on the outside, often times it’s because they have to be. Often, it’s because they are carrying a burden that should be put into the Father’s hands. You can help with that burden, through your prayers.

Another scheme of the devil which sows fear in our hearts is dissatisfaction with life. It’s one thing to want to improve your life and you pray for God’s blessings and you go out and do what you can do, to control what you can control. But it’s another thing to hate your life. That makes someone too self-focused and they tend to be bitter towards people who experience success in life. Sometimes people think that what they have right now is all they’ll get to have and life is not going to get any better. Feeling hopeless is torture. Sometimes we also get tired of waiting for God to answer our prayers.

This is when you should pray for your yourself or your spouse to trust God just a little bit longer. Pray that he or she will be content with life and trust that God knows what He is doing.

If a certain amount of anxiety sends us to the Great Physician, it can be helpful. If it saps our faith, then it is dangerous. We cannot allow fear in our spouse to keep him or her from being the person God designed them to be.

WHAT TO PRAY FOR:
Please pray for your spouse that
She / he will not be controlled by a spirit of fear,
She / he will give their fears to God.
She / he will not be anxious about others.
He / she will resist temptation.
He / she will be content in the Lord.
He / she will trust God and not fear Satan.
He / she will find peace in God.

LISTEN TO THE VOICE OF THE LORD;
2 Timothy 1:7 - “God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.”
1 John 4:18 - “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.”
Proverbs 29:25 - “The fear of man brings a snare, but he who trusts in the Lord will be exalted.”
James 1:12 - “Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.”
Psalm 34:4 - “I sought the Lord, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears.”

PRAYING FOR YOUR SPOUSE TO TRUST:
Many marriages have trust-issues. Money. Kids. Co-workers. Important decisions. Spiritual decisions.

If your spouse has trouble trusting you, it might not be entirely your fault. It might be that his or her trust has been violated in the past. It might have been a father. It might have been a boyfriend or girlfriend in the past. Or a prior spouse. Of course, we also might be at fault because of something we’ve done or not done. It could also be that trust was violated at some point in the past and you haven’t gotten beyond it. You hear frequently in the news how a school teacher has violated trust in a student in school.

Another possibility is that our spouse’s relationship with God might not be as strong as it could be and he or she just isn’t at that point yet where they can trust God as they need to. That’s the situation with Jesus and His disciples. Of course, they were not where they needed to be in their relationship with God. Jesus shows us and turns their expectations of God upside down. So Jesus had to pray that their trust in Him, as their trust in God, would grow. In John 14:1, Jesus says, “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me.” In the Greek language, those two verbs “believe” could be either imperatives or indicatives. In other words, Jesus could be saying: “Trust God! And trust Me too!” Or, He could be saying, “You already trust God. Now, trust Me too!” Or the other way around.

Pray that your spouse will grow in his or her trust in God.

When it comes to the marriage relationship, there are three extremely important areas in which spouses need to be completely trust worthy. Failure in these areas can cause the spouse’s trust to be weak in other areas:

1. He or she needs to keep the marriage bed undefiled (Heb. 13:4).
Nothing violates trust like immorality. I understand that once one’s trust has been violated in this area, the innocent person’s life changes forever. You can forgive; it’s just hard to forget. Restoration is possible. It takes time to rebuild that type of damage to the relationship. You also should be careful in this way that your behavior should never be interpreted as inappropriate or flirtatious with the opposite gender. That can damage your spouse’s trust in you.

2. Provide for your family (1 Timothy 5:8). Be wise with your finances.
You cannot live without money. And if someone wastes money - whether through gambling (which is wasting money) or buying things that are not necessary when money is tight - this can undermine trust in your spouse. A man needs to make sure his family has what they need. I understand that, according to Businessnewsdaily.com, a millennial stays at a job for 33 months. If someone is single, that might not be a problem. But if you’ve got a spouse and children to provide for, that could be a serious problem. It can undermine trust.

3. Each spouse must fulfill their duty to each other (1 Cor. 7:3).
I’m talking here about one’s attitude and behavior toward each other and toward your children. If you have a “short fuse” - if you’ve never learned how to control your outbursts of anger - it can cause trust problems. Because the spouse never knows if the smallest matter could cause an explosion.

But if you are faithful in these three big areas, your spouse will find it very easy to trust you. Of course, trust has to be mutual. You can’t grow in your relationship if you can’t trust. That’s why you should pray for your spouse to trust. Listen to the words of King Solomon from Proverbs 31:11: “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.” A lot of the discord that occurs in a marriage relationship comes down to trust issues. The ultimate goal is to get to the point in our faith that we can trust Jesus to work in our spouse to mould him or her into His image.

Pray, also, that God will grant you the wisdom you need to lead your family in the right direction. Only God knows the future. Only God knows what is best for you. Only God knows what is going to happen to you next week, next month, next year. He will prepare you for what is coming, if you will allow Him to do that and you trust Him to always treat you in a holy way. Men, let your wife see that you trust God just that much and pray that your trust in God will be evident in your life.

Trust can be weakened easily and it takes time to restore it. But, it can be restored if we are doing the right thing, which includes praying. “Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary” (Gal. 6:9).

WHAT TO PRAY FOR:
She / he will trust the Lord with his or her whole heart.
She / he will trust you.
She / he will forgive you if you have violated that trust.
You will be a trustworthy husband or wife.
He / she will trust God’s wisdom, power, and love is working in each of you.
He / she will be a man or woman of strong faith.

THE VOICE OF THE LORD:
2 Samuel 22:31 - “As for God, His way is blameless; The word of the Lord is tested; He is a shield to all who take refuge in Him.”
Proverbs 3:5 - “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.”
Psalm 5:11-12 - “But let all who take refuge in You be glad, Let them ever sing for joy; And may You shelter them, That those who love Your name may exult in You. For it is You who blesses the righteous man, O Lord, You surround him with favor as with a shield.”
Psalm 118:8 - “It is better to take refuge in the Lord Than to trust in man.”
Isaiah 50:10 - “Who is among you that fears the Lord, That obeys the voice of His servant, That walks in darkness and has no light? Let him trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God.”

Take home message: Pray for your spouse or friends, that they will grow in their trust so they will fear less.